Relationships: Cause and Effect

In our world, there is always something that has an effect or influence on something else. Some call it “cause and effect”. Others call it the “domino effect”. At the end of the day, everything has a pull on something else.

Now, it took me time and experiences to learn this. From my having a rough morning leading to me going off on a classmate to my not studying regularly resulting to having to cram for a test the night before, various small things in my life showed me this.

However, the greatest thing that proved this to me was witnessing connections I had with others affect other relationships in my life.

My having issues with and disrespecting my mom lead to others not wanting to deal with me. My not being on the best terms with my father led me to thirst, and I do me thirst, for a boyfriend.

I wanted to have a “man” so bad a guy smiling at me made me wonder if he’d be the one. It is only the grace of God that I still have my virtue.

The funniest thing is, as much as these situatio…

Temptation: Not More Than You Can Bare

You know, when you grow up in church you see a lot of stuff frequently. From choirs singing to people passing around offering plates to even children scribbling on paper. You just become used to seeing some stuff.

You get used to hearing stuff too, like scriptures. Yeah, there are definitely some verses that you hear on a regular from, “For God so loved the world…,” (John 3:16) to, “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart…,” (Proverbs 3:5 - 6) to even “The Lord is my shepherd…” (Psalm 23:1)

One in particular that I continue to hear frequently is 1 Corinthians 10:13, which is the inspiration for the phrase, “He won't put more on you than you can bare.”

Now when you look at that scripture, even though it does not exactly say the phrase above, it hits a few different areas that truly will blow your mind.

First off, it begins with, “The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience…,” (1 Corinthians 10:13a)

When you just think on that thing...The fact that regar…

Forgiveness: Break Every Chain

In life, various things happen. Some of it is good & some of it is bad, and of course it is all tied to someone’s decision. From mistakes to victories, life is full of cause-and-effect, and these events and struggles can leave chains on us that can truly take control.

I'll use myself for example. Due to various things that people I trusted & looked up to had done & the effect that it had on me I became very bitter. Even though I claimed to follow God I struggled with one of His most well-known commands.

This lead to chains of frustration, low self-esteem, dishonor, & the list went on and on.

It was not until about 3 years ago that I truly began to break those chains with three steps: acknowledgement, understanding, and humility.

First off, I had to be honest about the fact that these things were still bothering me.

You know how it is. You start telling yourself that it does not matter and they are nothing. Then you start talking about it to other people, telling th…

Destiny: Pricey Path for a Priceless Purpose

When most of us are born we have an idea of what our life will be like. From our job to our house to even our spouse, we have it all planned out & want that path to be followed.

However, as many of us know our vision and our reality rarely line up. Some things are best subtracted and others are best added so we can get the best product from the equation we call life.

This results in many changes and detours on the path that we call life. Sometimes we have to make U-turns & change directions. I myself am currently having to revisit some streets that I thought would be a distant memories, but in the end it is what is best.

Look at me for example. I have had an “interesting” life for a 23 year old. From sickness to homelessness to low self-esteem, my life has been filled with many ups and downs, & I did not like it.

I would say I did not understand it, but that would be a lie because I UNDERSTOOD IT REGARDING OTHERS, but not myself.

Me, I loved the idea of greatness & suc…

Honor: Obedience Is Better Than Sacrifice

According to honor means to, “regard with great respect,” or to, “fulfill (an obligation) or keep (an agreement).”

I know it may seem a little traditional or plain to start off with a definition, but I felt it was best that I defined what I was referring to before going into what I have learned and am currently learning about it.

Now, I am going to be very honest. This was an area that I was very weak in in the past and though I have grown better, I do still feel this is a thorn in my side.

It is one of those areas that must be swiftly cast down, and if it is not it can cause many problems.

Of course, I can no longer say that I do not know where it stems from because it is rooted in rebellion. For over half of my life I have struggles with an attitude of, “But my point is” or “I get that but.” Please, I used the term “but” so much you would have thought it was my middle name.

Thankfully, I was able to grow, however there are some situations where this negativity likes t…

Identity: Discovering the Necessary Driving Force

What do you feel makes you who you are? I know that may seem a little blunt, but sometimes it is best to just go for the jugular.

If you had to name one thing that makes you you, what would it be? Would it be music, art, maybe even a lover? What is the thing that you feel makes you tick?

I know for some years I may have said music. For others I probably would have said writing. However, over the last couple of years I discovered that I really was allowing PEOPLE to drive me.

That’s right people. For all those years “Mrs. Trust in the Lord w/ all thine heart” & “God loves me for who I am” was being pushed & navigated by what others thought. My concern was not God’s will and it was not God’s way. It was my image.

Now, some people may say there is nothing wrong with that cause people’s support and approval is what gets you to the top. To them I will say this. First, I do agree that connections are very necessary to succeed in any arena, however full dependency on someone else’s …

Perspective: Turn your lemons into lemonade

In our current world everyone has different views. Whether it is over social media, politics, or even education, every single individual has varying opinions about what is best. Things kind of play out that way regarding how we view our lives too.

You see, we all have dreams and goals, desires and wishes, and many of us press our hardest to reach them because we feel they are the answer. We think that it will fulfill us. That our smile will never disappear once they come around. So, we break our backs to reach them, however things don’t always happen as fast as we want them to.

I myself am dealing with something similar right now. In May 2017, I graduated with a B.A. in Journalism from Hampton University. I began looking for jobs in my field not long after, but due to different factors I was unable to find one. So, in order to live a comfortable life I have been working in fast food.

Now, this has been hitting me very hard because I expected so much more from myself by this time. I th…